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Are You in a Contentious Relationship? Understand What Domestic Violence Means

29 December 2015 by Kenneth Pierce

Nobody starts their day out expecting to end up charged with domestic violence. However, if you're in a contentious domestic relationship, you run that risk -- especially if you don't fully understand what counts as "domestic violence" these days. Before you end up with a criminal record for domestic violence, this is what you should know.

What is domestic violence?

Domestic violence is usually a "catch-all" term for different types of assault and battery when it occurs between family members or people who are intimate with each other. Most of the time, assault is defined as the threat of violence and battery is actual unwanted touching that is done in a violent manner. Not all jurisdictions separate the two offenses.

Sometimes frustration can build up during an argument and cause one or both people to act out of character. A single incident can be blown out of proportion -- but it doesn't take much to end up facing charges. You can end up charged with assault and battery for a variety of actions that might surprise you:

• shoving someone, even to push them out of your way so that you can leave
• blocking someone's path as they try to leave
• throwing something, like a cup of coffee or a shoe, if it accidentally hits someone
• grabbing a phone out of somebody's hand
• spitting on someone in anger
• poking someone in the chest in frustration

Keep in mind that yelling and screaming, while maybe inappropriate, is not domestic violence, even if there is name calling involved. However, if the situation you're in seems to be escalating, walk away. It's all too easy to end up in jail instead.

When is physical violence justified?

If you feel threatened and have a reasonable fear that you are immediately about to be injured, or your children are about to be injured, the law recognizes your right to defend yourself and your children. Your response has to be rational and no more aggressive than necessary, however, in order to be legal action.

For example, consider that you and your spouse are arguing and you announce that you're leaving and your spouse picks up a gun and threatens you with it. In response, you hit your spouse with a bat and flee. Your response would be reasonable and justified.

However, if your spouse just says that he or she will kill you if you leave, without making any threatening gesture toward you, hitting him or her with a bat before you leave wouldn't be a rational response to just a verbal threat -- unless he or she had a history of violent behavior toward you and you could prove to the court that you believed he or she would make good on the threat.

Domestic violence is a serious issue. If you're charged with domestic violence, many states impose additional penalties that go beyond normal assault and battery convictions. You can also be forced into court-ordered treatment programs and find that it is a factor in any child custody hearings as well. It's important to seek legal help as soon as possible. Consider speaking to a criminal defense lawyer, such as Robert E Long & Associates Ltd, if you're charged.

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